On Engagement

(I’m posting this here rather than at jamynflork because it’s about feminism as much as it is about the wedding, and I think that even people who don’t want to see pictures of potential dresses might be interested to read it)

I guess I expected that when Jameson and I decided to get engaged, I’d soon be experiencing some frustration about patriarchal cultural assumptions and marriage. I knew I’d have some discussing to do with various people in my life about the whole last name issue, and whatever decisions Jameson and I ultimately make about that (and I expect that that’s gonna be one of those conversations that just keeps on happening forever and ever. Yay). I’ve felt since I was very young that being “given away” at the altar by one man to another man was not a thing I wanted for myself. While I love my father, and wish very much to honor his part in my upbringing at my wedding, I’m not his property, and I won’t be Jameson’s, either. The hand-off won’t be in the ceremony, and I know I’ll have to answer questions about that.

I knew going in that, as a feminist, assertive young woman with some very definite ideas about what her wedding should and should not symbolize, I’d have a lot of rude questions ahead of me, and a lot of assumptions to subvert. I did know that.

I just didn’t expect it to start so soon.
( Oh, you better believe I’ve got more to say. )

The Exciting Conclusion to the Renovation Adventure

Ok. I'm going to have to learn, at some point, how to do all kinds of home-repair and renovation things. Because I'm never going to trust anyone else to do them again.

The renovation at my little house was supposed to take two weeks. It's been a month. There's a hole in the floor, and apparently it won't get taken care of until November, at the earliest.

In the meanwhile, Mom and Dad are having a party this weekend, and they want their house to be clean and presentable. So I get to move all of my stuff back home, and then move it again when the contractors can do the floor.

Oh, and all the dust from when they took out the wall? And the plastic sheeting that did nothing whatsoever to protect the furniture I left behind? And many of their tools? They left all that. For me to clean up.

The best part is that I have basically just today to take care of all of this. They were still painting up until evening yesterday, and tomorrow I'll be needing to cook and do party prep.

Soothing thoughts sent in my general direction wouldn't hurt anything.